Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize
