i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
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