Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Of course I have a pirate flag
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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