is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Randomize
