her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
I think I just shit out all my problems.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
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