Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
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