he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Randomize