dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
