Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize