so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
