So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
