How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
