loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
This toilet bowl is my home.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Randomize
