i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
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