I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
Life is so much better after having sex.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
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