and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
