were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize
