So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
