Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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