standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
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