I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Randomize
