Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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