Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
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