rhymes with "ouble enetration"
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Randomize
