That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
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