he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
