Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
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