Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
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