he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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