I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
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