I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Randomize