I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Randomize
