oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
