I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
Randomize