Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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