Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Randomize