I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
