I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
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