dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
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