I would like to be the first to explain to you that if you've woken up with bruised knuckles this morning, it's because last night you tried climbing out of our car window and into the drive through window at maccas. The cashier chick freaked out and slammed the window on you and beat you around the head with her headset thingy.
Shittttttt.
Be not ashamed. It was youtube-worthy.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
Randomize
