I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Randomize
