So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize