New low: just hacked my moms facebook
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
Randomize
