i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Randomize
