i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
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