She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
