I just saw a hot homeless man
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
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