Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
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