he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
Randomize
