Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
