do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize
